You have shaky hands and can’t shave straight.
When you eat soup, you splatter it all over the place. When you try to shave, you create zig-zag patterns in your beard. Both attributes are ungentlemanly, and while I can’t help your soup problem, I can save your goatee with this goatee shaving template.
There’s no shame in not growing a full beard. Perhaps your beard only grows well on your chin. Your cheeks, on the other hand, look like a minefield with bare patches here and there. It’s no wonder that you only want a goatee, but for Pete’s sake, let’s make sure that goatee is shapely.
This goatee shaving template will save your chin. Insert the thing in your mouth, and no matter how shaky your hands are, you’ll have the perfect goatee every morning. Just dab on a little beard soap, pull out your safety razor, hold up this beard stencil, and have at it. Your childhood skills of not touching the sides of Cavity Sam by playing Operation will come in handy, helping you craft the perfect goatee.
Just make sure your wife is not in the bathroom when you use it. You’ll look quite silly.
GROW A BEARD.